the fall of Rome

I think maybe this is how Rome first began to fall. One night someone put their cup in the sink -- and left it to be washed in the morning. Time went by, and soon an entire supper's dishes sat in the sink all night. Still, this took the Roman dish user by surprise. Did I do that? they'd ask themselves in the morning. Huh, they'd say -- originally a Latin term. As Rome fell and everything felt like an effort, Romans got tired of speaking Latin, and only wrote it now and then. Ancient graffiti remains today on some of the walls in Italy: HUH, carved into the stone. These markings, along with the equally ubiquitous  semper ubi sub ubi, are undeniable evidence of the bewilderment -- and regression -- that came with the gradual approach of the Fall.

They used to pride themselves on making the bed every morning, because that's what the previous Roman elders did, and now they were elders themselves. Romans lived in the Golden Age of Making the Bed, and were a proud people. But as the Empire fell, or at least began to lean, they began to think: Why do we do this? I never come in here except to sleep, and no one else ever comes in here. They did not fully understand that making the bed was holding the fabric of society together, holding together the Empire. People began to get out of bed and then simply "close" the bed. No tucking. Just a quick throw of the blankets in the general direction of the pillows. It was a shortcut that would lead to others.

A mass of Romans went through this unraveling at the same time (they were in middle age, though that term was not to be named for another 1000 years) and each Roman thought maybe they were the only one slacking a bit. But the truth is that everyone was, in their own way. Someday, they secretly feared, they might not even floss.

They began to talk to themselves more. Recently not overheard by anyone in a kitchen I know well: "Tear along the dotted line? I'm trying to tear along the dotted line! You're not giving me much to work with here!" It was just like this in ancient Rome, except without the plastic bag of Romaine (ah, the irony!) lettuce to struggle with. No, back then they began to talk to themselves about the things of their day: Ubi est mea sub ubi? they'd ask themselves in the dark of morning.

At the peak of the Empire, Romans were famous for getting in 10,000 steps a day! It is one of the things that made the Empire so great and powerful. One day they settled for 9,524 and did not even run up and down the stairs to reach 10,000. One day, when it was 8 degrees outside, they didn't even try -- and got only 3,560. The writing, as I've said, was on the wall. Eventually, pathetically, they seemed to stop writing altogether.

Rome fell in the wintertime. I understand. I really do.