the body writes back

p,

     Sorry it's taken so long to respond. It generally takes me some time to digest things. But you know that. Plus I can't hold a pen, no thanks to you. But I hear you. I feel you. You're grateful to me.
     I think you expect me to say nice things back, to embrace you for taking care of me. The truth is that you're often in my way. You never stop talking, for one thing, and it's annoying. Throughout our relationship I've told you when it's time to sleep, but you are not paying attention. The next morning, when I drag us both out of bed, you promise to listen next time. And then that evening, you force me to stay up late again, reading ever blurrier books.
     Or you promise to give me more oxygen, take slower, deeper breaths. That's all well and good for a couple of minutes, and then you're off onto something else and have totally forgotten me.
     As for all the surgery and chemo and whatnot you've done to me in the past couple of years,  I've tried to take it on the chin. Do what you think you need to do, but please have a little faith in me. Your ruminating doesn't help things.
     I sense that you blame me for the genes in my cells, and that I just can't swallow. I am doing my best here. I've healed over and over again, many more times than you imagine or remember. The cut on my shin? That's nothing. Being a body is like living with thousands of hyperactive children under one small and leaky roof. During the rainy season. I've got buckets everywhere, and also have to constantly pick things up and put them where they belong. This is not a complaint; I'm just saying. I did not pick my genes, and even if I had, almost all of them are fabulous. Really, p, sometimes you just focus on the bad. It's not a good habit.
     I'm loving the walks and the good food. Thanks for finding good smells, nice things to look at. We're both so lucky, right?
     Meditation? I guess that's good for both of us, although sometimes it reminds me of when you tried to teach me to pat my head and rub my belly at the same time. But I'll keep practicing if you will.
     The bouncing thing is pure pleasure for me, so thanks. Sorry about the leg cramps afterwards if you overdo it. Sometimes I don't know how else to get your attention. Just goes to show that we can really wake up fast if we have to, huh?
     Also, please pardon the furnace problems. I have my people on it, but it's a pretty old furnace, and eventually these things do break down. That sleeping naked on top of the sheets idea? Works for me.
     And you're right -- I don't care about the scarring and all that. Those are my artwork! Believe me, you want me to scar. It's one of my best tricks.
     Not as chatty as you are. Some of us have jobs to do. I'm only half kidding. Lunch?